Its pitiful....really pitiful

Alright...I am angry at myself. Why? Oh a lot of reasons....but one in particular.
Inferiority.
I really hate that word. Its a pitiful word with a pitiful past attached to it.

I don't know why, but I have always been my own worst enemy. I do wish I had some strange archenemy in a physical form that I could battle and defeat physically, but.....if you are your own worst enemy...then there's hardly anything you can do about it...(sigh)


Anyway...inferiority....why it exists in me is a very long story and I am not about to tell it....its too unbearable and I don't have a sad violin to put with it..

In a figure of speech..............

Inferiority, in my translation is feeling less than adequate, not quite measuring up, not being what you should be, not meeting your highest goals, not suited for performance, unfit for service, useless....meaningless....not suited for human interaction. That's my definition of Inferiority....that's how I see it.



It makes me want to hide myself, become a hermit, and drift into my own world where I'm the OPPOSITE of everything that I am in reality...charming, lovely, fair, wonderful, stupendous, and all the other amazing things that I should be. But I'm not.




This is especially visible when I come across a human specimen that is stunningly lovely......I immediately want to run and get my nerdy self out of their sight....Ugh humans... :(

They usually look like this..





In my eyes, I look like this:



If they even come near me....I find myself screaming on the inside..
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!""


Or running away entirely comes to mind...




I can't even look at them....and that is inferiority from the nerd's point of view.....its a hard giant to kill.....it seems so large, and I feel so small....but some day I will muster the courage to kill it...


---Praise Sharp